I'm Me, You're You

It's raining outside, my head hurts, and I don't know where to start...

First things first: I didn't forget about this blog, I wasn't just lazy, or ignore you (if anyone actually reads this), or get locked in my basement by a pedophile relative; but my head has just been so full of stuff that I honestly didn't know what to write. I still don't. If I'm truthful I think I was scared to attempt putting digits to keys for fear of what I might read the cursor revealing to me on my own screen. At least until my thoughts and feelings had stopped making me quite so dizzy.

While I don't quite feel the need to put here the finer details of why I have felt such a mess lately, suffice to say that it definitely felt like a pretty hard fall to the bottom, and a lot internal work to get myself to the point of making sense of things again.

The outcome of said events were that 1) I lost the extra 5kgs (11lbs) of muscle I had just spent the past 3 months living/sweating at the gym to gain; 2) I still don't have a job, and thus am broke; & 3) realising that everybody has flaws, including me, and that is OK.

You (yes, you) and I are both perfectly good enough, just the way we are.

It doesn't matter if you don't look a certain way, don't know what your 'life's calling' is, whether you prefer the snow over the sun, or like to eat you pizza backwards. None of that crap that people try to define us by really matters. It just doesn't. It's not who you are. That stuff is just like fluff. What matters most is the imprint you leave on those lucky enough to know you. My favourite people I have met so far in life have made me happy to be around them just by being comfortable being their own quirky, 'flawed' selves.

It's OK to have work-ons; things to try and improve in ourselves; goals and dreams to aim for... but putting too much emphasis on who you think you should be (or who you think other people think you should be), instead of just being comfortable with who you are, isn't a good thing. Trust me... it's a lesson I've just spent the better part of a year learning.

The only thing you have to do is be true to yourself... and realise all the other stuff will follow naturally, on it's own.

I'll be back here soon...

cht #4

After feeling rather disillusioned with our own [societies] take on what is 'important' in life, a statement from a show on TV last week: 'Greatest Cities Of The World: Paris', struck me:

(Of Parisians): "...how disciplined they are, how much effort and work they put into quality of life..."

So it needs to be said, that better is not just cheaper or 'more of'. Nor is it simply faster or stronger. Better is not based on science, financial reports, or politics. It certainly isn't "I have" while "you don't".

Better means of quality; or of real human value. Placing value on quality - most importantly quality of life - is something seemingly lost on many people, but not on me.

Easter Chocolate

Jeez.... I wish it didn't taste so good. I also wish I could eat it with a clear conscience - but now I'm meant to be a 'fitness professional' every bite comes with a guilt trip. Plan of attack: devour it all as quickly as possible, follow with plenty of Metamucil and then pretend that it never happened.

It's Been A While...

Truth is that the last 4 months or so have been super busy and completely boring at the same time.

Last December was a rushed affair as I rather spur-of-the-momently enrolled in a course for the new year; one that I had been thinking about for a while, but had not actually expected to start quite so soon. Never-the-less I handed over my money, signed my name, and quit my job all very quickly before the next intake was scheduled to begin.

Now the whole story need not be told, other than to say that the next eight weeks of my "accelerated learning" experience at the Australian Institute Of Fitness was pretty intense. Mentally it needed a lot of work, study, and focus. They also pushed us hard physically and most days leave you feeling sore and exhausted. To top it off pushing students out of their comfort zone seems to be a modus operandi at the 'tute - not that I'm complaining; the classes were great and the course does exactly what it claims to - turned me in to a Personal Trainer. Now I just have to find work.

So there you have it - apart from a quick weekend away in the Woollongong / Kiama area (beautiful I must say), not much to report other than study, study, study. Never mind, I've now rediscovered my blogspace and hopefully, inspiration has rediscovered me...